Now Everyone Wants to Be On a Boat

Because meeting Mickey Mouse just isn't good enough for kids these days, Disney is stepping it up this summer. For all of you who have dreamed of going on sun-drenched Caribbean cruises with the tweenaged rich and famous, your dream has just come true.

In a brilliant attempt to lure families to their cruise lines, Disney now offers cruises with the stars of Camp Rock, Sonny With a Chance, JONAS, and several of their other official shows and movies. And by "stars," they mean minor supporting characters. Still, a cruise with That Breakdancing Kid from Camp Rock is a cruise with That Breakdancing Kid from Camp Rock. I personally dream of going on the cruise with Camp Rock's Alyson Stoner and Meaghan Martin on August 2nd. Staterooms the size of walk-in closets starting at $3400! Sleeps four!

Passengers on these cruises will get to take pictures with the stars, get stuff autographed by the stars, ask the stars questions during special panel discussions, and party it up for one "a high-energy evening with shows and a special musical performance" by a "Radio Disney star!"

This deal just cements the fact that cruise boats are the hot place to be this summer, whatever age you are. You know, grandparents and cruises go together like kids with funny haircuts and Warped Tour. Now Disney's appealing to the crowd who wants to be like Zack & Cody, not the ones who want the opportunity to sing "I'm On a Boat" while actually, you know, on a boat. Because that is so much cooler than shouting it at, say, the MTV Movie Awards.

Wait, maybe these kids do want to shout "I'm On a Boat," too...


NOTE: Parents with small children are advised to steer clear of the July 19th cruise featuring Jason Earles of Hannah Montana because people who meet Earles in person may realize that he is actually 32 years old, and this realization could scar your youngsters for life.

Yeah, and you thought Kevin Jonas being 21 was creepy.